Just a small thought

If you are going to something that you know is wrong don't take pictures!!!

One more thing if you are going to talk dirty to a chic don't leave it on her voicemail. Man people are moron's now a days.

Another day blah, blah, blah!

Another day another dollar right? I don't know because I'm not doing anything. I just set this guys PDA up but there's nothing to that. There is no way that I will be doing this when I'm 35. I better have something going for me but it seems like I will never get there. I know it's no ones fault but my own and the World definitely does NOT owe me a living. I need to have a job that means something to me. I want to do something that's gratifying and this is not it. I know it could be because there are a lot of very, very, successful people in the technical world. Yes, they probably all started where I am at now but they did it when they were like 22 not 31. I have to go back to school or I am going no where. I need direction in my life. I have to do this myself and quit resting it on someone else's shoulders.

Divorce Crap

My ex wife got her phone cut off and now and can't call my kids. She won't give me her cell phone number and I guess she isn't going to get it turned back on. I am sure she blamed it on me not paying child support even though I haven't missed a payment yet. It comes out of my paycheck each month so I have really no control of it after that. My kids need new clothes and they need to quit getting their heads filled with lies. Josh is alway Dirty when I pick him up and he never has any new clothes on but his mother always does. She needs psychological help.

Kicking the habit

I need to kick the habit but the habit is so good, or is it? I don't know anymore. I don't know if I do it becuase I'm hooked or because I like the way it makes me feel. This is probably why I should kick the habit. I hate to blame my laziness and lack of effort on this habit but sometimes I wonder. I go to work everyday, I pay my bills, I pay my chid support on time and I always pick my kids up when I am suppose to. Big Deal right, there are alot of fathers out there that do this right? I never do it around my kids but my daughter is getting older and I know she has smelt it on my shirt before. One day she will be at a party and smell that same smell and then it will pop in her head and she will know. What will I do then? This is why I need to kick the habit so when and if she does confront me about it I will be past that stage in my life and I won't feel stupid telling her why she shouldn't do it. Man, I would be such a hypocrite and she probably won't respect my opinions ever again. People say that its not a big deal (and it might not be to them) but I think it is becoming one in my life.



Later

Man I make myself sick!

I say I'm going to do this, and I say I am going to do that, but I never do it. I finsh some things but I never take on the goals that I set for myself. When did I become the biggest procrastinator in the world? When did I let myself become so lazy and non driven? Man I suck hahaha. I need to snap out of this or I am going to be doing the same thing until Im 65. I will be making the same paycheck living in a measly apartment alone. No chic wants to be with a guy that just sits on his ass an does nothing unless he's rich and I'm not. Well, at least not yet but I am getting up there in age and its either now or never unless I hit the lottery......Yeah right!


Later